Do we follow God and have relationship with Him in the same way we have relationship with spouses and friends? In human relationships nothing is perfect. We love our friends and we love our loves, yet mixed in with that are things that we do not love or like in them. Do we love God in that same way but won't admit it? Do we love Him but find things about Him that we are not "crazy about?" When we think of God do our hearts melt within us? Are our hearts "strangely warmed"? Or are there some slivers of disappointment, disagreement or even dislike there?
If He is not ALTOGETHER lovely to us, if some doubt or question lingers, we will not be able to love Him wildly and with total abandon. We must bring all our disappointments, questions, doubts and fears to Him. If we can admit that there is a "shadow of a doubt," or perhaps even great doubt, we are closer to honest relationship. If we can admit that there is something that He has done, or allegedly done, that bothers us, we are closer to wild abandon then if we hold our holdouts politely concealed. For they are not concealed to God! He knows how we feel toward Him! If human beings can write lamentable love songs like, "I should have known by the look in your eyes, there was something missing" then how much more does God know when our love toward Him is measured or cool?
Let us be man or woman enough to bring our uncertainties to Him. Until then we cannot say we are entirely His. Until then we cannot love Him with wild abandon--something He longs for, and so richly deserves. There is no fault in Him, He is altogether lovely. May we all discover that completely.
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